Tuesday 16 April 2013

Mistakes Men Make When They Grow Up



Most of the mistakes men make today are the ones they were never taught to avoid as boys.  It is inevitable, man would grow and when he does  it is usually beyond most people’s expectation, because humans are always in the habit of using a singular moment of one’s life in predicting every other period of the  person’s life, talk about mistakes men make, forgetting the fact that seasons change and so does circumstances.  Opportunity arises and status change. With hard work, time, chance, prayer and opportunity, boys become self-sufficient but time after time, they are ten crucial mistakes men make which is repeated generation after generation. Here we count them down.

- THEY GET FAT: Boys after they begin to earn some money and generally leave school, begin to eat more, as they have more money to spend and most of the time their jobs deprives them of constant exercise which was normally done in school when reading, walking from one lecture theatre to the other, eating moderately and all was the order of the day.
                                       fat black man
 It is also pertinent to note that the African society also encourages this mistake men make, they see a man with bulging stomach as a well fed man. As a result our young handsome boys go out of shape and become heap loads of junk. This is a great mistake because the disadvantages far outweighs the advantages, apart from the fact that people may tend to respect you more because you look older than your age (fatter), you are causing great hazards to yourself and this would really begin to show when you hit 40. Apart from the general weakness ,laziness and constant sweating  associated with fat, bad breath, arthritis , high blood pressure, hypertension, muscles cramps and all would definitely shorten the life of an obese ,unfit and lazy man .
                                         fat black man
This is by far the commonest and deadliest one of all the mistakes men make . Ask yourself, have you ever seen a fat old lady or a fat old man? We are talking 70s and 80s. Only in literature books, what happened to the fat ones? They are dead. The typical black man associates eating with enjoyment, most people across the world eat to stay alive and give them nutrients, but over here most people just make their meal sections a knock out section. Eat moderately, lay off alcohol and exercise. Don’t make this mistake men make.

- SPEND MONEY ON GIRLFRIENDS: When boys become young men, most of them refuse to get married
 but prefer to have string of girlfriends who would ask them for recharge cards, allowances ,vacation trips, house rents and all. They extend their bachelorhood, claiming they are trying to find the right person, or they are not ready to settle down yet. 
                                      Flirt
This mistake men make leads to the loss of valuable resources which would otherwise have helped build a family. Ladies always like flocking around young men for one benefit or the other and most young men, waste their time and money enjoying the attention.

- REFUSING TO GROW UP: There is a bit of immaturity in every male child, it is common to see young men do  all the things they were not allowed to do as kids, continuing in their childhood behaviours because they are now on their own. It is not uncommon to see young men who hitherto have never kept late nights, always rose up earlier, dressed moderately, used clean language , drove cars carefully, change all because there is no longer a strong parental or mentor presence. They go ahead to counter that verse that says the child that is trained in a certain way would not depart from it. This mistake men make results in the young men finally learning for themselves why they were prevented from hitherto living their lives according to their juvenile thoughts and spontaneous behaviours and even though experience is said to be the best teacher, some things (circumstances) are better,” not experienced”. Don’t make this mistake men make.

- BID FAREWELL TO SPIRITUALITY:  “ boys  would always be boys”, this statement seem to accept the shortcomings of the male and even give room for  the mistakes men make by the concluding nature of it. Boys would not always be boys, there would be a time when they would become men, and in the bible which we always reference, we read the phrase “ and I sought for a man” not a boy. 
                                         
Most young men make the mistake of abandoning the things of God and relieving themselves of the devotion to his word and all forms of spirituality. It is a fact that boys don’t go to places of worship as much as their female counterparts, but it becomes even worse when there is a job or a commitment somewhere else, these men would give their best in their respective jobs but become visiting Christians in church .  The problem with this is that they lose the cover and power enjoyed from continuous fellowship with God and they unconsciously expose their lives and families to danger and also let their spirit man die leading to grievous results. This is also one of the deadliest mistakes men make, forgetting the fact that man is a spirit being and we need to nurture our spirituality as much as our body.

- CHANGE THEIR BELIEFS: This mistake men make is just like the previous, but it is of a different form, when boys become men, one of the greatest mistake men make is that they change their beliefs and conviction over certain germane issues. This is mainly due to the environment they find themselves, where they see people who are somewhat of a success story in their chosen career who don’t have the same principles as they do but still seem to be succeeding. So issues such as  immorality, womanising, alcohol ingestion, corporate lie telling , ruthlessness and all others like it are imbibed into their once squeaky clean personality, because since the boss is doing it, “what is good for the goose is also good for the gender?. The problem with this is that such people end up being victims of demonic oppression and soul harvesting. They miss out on God’s own  blessing for their lives  which added no sorrow.

- WASTE RESOURCES ON CHILDHOOD FANTASIES;it is not uncommon to see young men, who waste their hard earned money on childhood fantasies and forming of new expensive habits.  This is usually fuelled by the pop culture and entertainment world motivation. It is pertinent to note that most young men are not financially wise, that includes even the ones that work in financial institutions.
                                     childhood fantasies
 Instead of constant investing of excess cash, they waste them getting things they have craved for when they were much younger not knowing that their expenditure is bound to increase with the advent of a personal family. It is not uncommon to see young men who are regarded by the public as being in a well-paid job borrowing money before pay day. This is a very common mistake men make and it leads them to poverty and makes them end up as irresponsible husbands and fathers.

- KEEP UP WITH THE JONESES: Most young men get into unnecessary rivalry and contest with friends, being the first to buy a car or spend money on an expensive item; most times it is usually done unconsciously which makes it very difficult to curb. The problem with this mistake men make is that the young man loses sense of purpose for his life and makes silly and childish decisions which leads to a lot of regrets and problems in the future.

- MARRY BY LUST: One of the global errors made by male folks is judging the opposite sex by their physical appearance When you go to the grocery store  to buy Apple, it is very common to pick the apple that looks fine and smooth but in some cases some of them would end up harbouring soft brown patches when eaten. That is how humans are .it would be so silly for any man to get in a relationship with any one just because of their looks or physical attributes. 
                                       Lust of the flesh
There is no face so beautiful that would not have wrinkles later on, likewise every other part. Every young man is to seek God’s face and find inner piece concerning his intended spouse, if God doesn't say yes don’t take them to the altar. Pray to know God’s will concerning your intended spouse and he would answer you speedily. When men marry based on lust, they expose themselves to a troubled marriage and future, because the marriage lasts longer than the lust and when what brought you together is no more. The marriage becomes a living hell. Don’t make this mistake men make.

- BECOME PROUD:Young men change with changing status, the male is naturally born with ego and this skyrockets when he starts getting some favourable returns in his line of business or chosen career. It is common to see young men, who listen to nobody, seeks advice from nobody and generally do things their own way. They gauge themselves by themselves for themselves. 
                                                     
They understand not that there is nothing man has in this world that he has not been given, that the race is not for the swift but it is the Lord who shows mercy to man. They continue in their state of pride and become enemies of God, because our God , the only living God hates the proud with a passion and he brings them low, and who can save you , if God is the one bringing you down?. Another way to put this is that  the forces of nature would constantly go against the proud. 

- DEPEND ON THE ARM OF FLESH: Men are very practical creatures, and so they like being logical and realistic in all they do, but in all their logic they sometimes  leave out their lives when dealing with God. They separate their work from God not knowing that God is as concerned about their work , their life and all as much as he is concerned about their soul. So they look unto certain people for something and  leave God out of it. They rely on connections, contacts and groups for certain advancements in their lives while they look up to God only for their soul nourishment. They take up jobs, appointments, contracts and get married without seeking the mind of God, and letting God lead them in life. This is a very grievous mistake , because God created man and has the blueprint of his life with him. Man in himself doesn’t know his full potential, he only just tries to discover it day after day. God knows man’s destiny and can also direct him in what to do and what not to do.  This is totally summed up in proverbs 3: 1-8. Don’t make this mistake men make. The result of young men doing things on their own can be derived from this above passage as short life, poverty, disfavour, bad name in the sight of God and man, crooked paths , ill health and weak bones.
Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter, fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. For God will bring every deed into judgement including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil.  {Ecclesiastes 12:13-14}

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